Relationships take us places and introduce us into the worlds of other people; they are the original passports and visas that take us on our physical, mental, and emotional journeys in life. They are the forces in life that drive us toward success and failure and propel us into our destinies. Some people are put into our lives to shape our destinies, some people are destiny shapers; the problem is that they can shape our destinies for good or for bad. We do not succeed or failed on our own, the relationships we have with others play a role in our success and failures. Life will always present a person or persons in our lives that will help pave our paths toward success or failure. When Rosa Parks defied the segregated bus policy in Montgomery, Alabama, neither she nor Martin Luther King Jr could have known that this act would have brought them together and shaped their destinies. It was this act of an unknown woman that introduced a relatively unknown pastor into his now well-known destiny of greatness. History has shown us over and over again how coming into contact with others can impact our lives. Malcolm X was a lost soul and broken man in Prison until he met the followers of Elijah Mohammad, this shaped his destiny by leading him to self-realization and world fame but in the end, these relationships also led him to his grave. One cannot always tell those who are meant to help shape his or her destiny and how they will shape it until the events of life play themselves out. Those with who we choose to enter into our world and have relationships play an important role in determining the kind of life that we live and the paths that we take in life.
I have come to realize that love and relationships are not one size fits all, “we have to come to the people as the people.” I have learned to approach people as I do nature, nature presents itself to us in many different forms, lives, and things; and in order to live in harmony with nature, we’ve to approach it as it is — not as we want it to be. Some people are like the sun, they’re beautiful and lovely from a distance but if we get too close they are harmful and toxic for our well being. I love the sun but because of its nature, I have to love it from a distance, if I get too close to the sun it will cause me harm. But at the right distance, not too far nor too close the sun is really healthy and beneficial for my well-being. The same is true with some of the people in our lives; we cannot give everyone the same access into our world. We have to put some people on the outer perimeter of our lives while giving others more intimate access. On the other hand, some people are like water that we have to interact with up close in order to receive their love and appreciate their beauty. Water does not have the same nature like the sun, with water we can get up close and personal with it. We can bathe our entire body with it, we can rub it against our skin externally and invite it into our bodies internally without worrying about it doing us any harm. We have to determine who we can love and interact with from a healthy distance and who we can love and interact with up close and personal. We should always keep in mind that some people enter into our lives as doors of opportunities, while others as obstacles that stand in the path of our prosperity. It is important to learn to approach people as they are, not who we want them to be.